Fap Industries

I've been working for FAP industries since I was a teenager but I've never drawn a single paycheck. Maybe I should give them a ring and get my dues?

Who would have thought that a bunch of head banging metal men would have such divinely lustrous locks? Seriously? It's enough to make Rapunzel say "DAYUM!".

The humble Lada is such a shady automobile, so steeped in negative infamy that not even the crash test dummies want to be caught in the drivers seat.

Yeah, you didn't really handle it, did you, Tom? I saw Jurassic Park, and I wouldn't say any of those dinosaurs were well handled. Sort it out, dude.

A drink pouring device. Of course it is. Two in a pack, nestled up lovingly against one another purely by accident. Whatever you say, pal.

I'm so jealous, think how awesome it would be to have a sweet goat buddy like that?! But it looks pretty fake to me, unless the goat has it's legs tied together?

If only everyone was as wise as young Tommy. Instead of experiencing the world for ourselves and deciding with our senses what's happening, let's just check Google Street View & if all's well there, then it must be fine. Douche.

We all know someone like this here Scumbag Steve--steals your smokes, drinks your beer, takes your video games and never gives them back. Hell, maybe you are this man, if so, when am I going to get Mass Effect 2 back off you?

This kid apparently has a father that knows exactly what he's doing. This is a note the 5 1/2 year old wrote to his mother. He was wearing a white tank-top at the time!

You probably remember them from the 1990s cartoon where they'd fight Shredder, hang with April & Casey and generally keep the world from falling into the clutches of evil. But they never looked like these bad mofos.

If might sounds a bit unusual in terms of make-up etiquette, but on the upside she smells good enough to eat. Someone get me a spoon, quick.