Slurp!

Cute little guy needs something cool and refreshing to wash down the tacos he was nom nom nomming.

Sure, having an underground crime lab and parking garage sounds cool, but nothing is ever as good as it first seems. Especially when bat poop is involved...

In answer to the question posed in the title, it appears the weed is at this guy's house. It looks ordinary from the outside but inside it's a dealer’s perfect lair with a forest of plants and escape route tunnel. Impressive work for a stoner.

Pedo Bear cares more about your kids than you and me combined! And to be honest, I kind of padded the me column a little just out of courtesy.

If you ever have a new neighbor move in next door and you notice this as his license plate, it might be time to put up the For Sale sign, or at the very least contact the FBI.

If you've ever gone to a restaurant with a girl you've probably heard this one before. Apparently it doesn't contain any calories if it's YOUR dinner...

Alcohol is good, alcohol is fun, but alcohol is also a nasty evil mudda who will do strange things to your eyes and change your vision to see things that are NOT there - Try and remember that if you can :(

But pussy pirates? That's just bloody disgusting! See, this is why ninjas are so much cooler than pirates!

If I saw this hot college babe I'm sure my mouth and tongue would do the same thing as her best buddy is doing - It's just a shame she comes with a friend who looks just like jaba the hut - Grotesque!

It's good to know in a time of crisis that you always have a government service looking for your back, a group of people who will stop at nothing to bring criminals to justice. Scarlett Johanssen must be relieved!?

Well, what do you see? If you see a nut and bolt and some wood, then thank God. If you see anything else, then you might want to check the pulse of the women you've been sleeping with?