Heinz Automato 2

Want an automatic ketchup delivery system? Tough titties. That dream is still a little ways off yet. Sure, there are people working on it, but they're not exactly humanity's best and brightest...

Christians get hysterical about yoga being the work of the devil, if they mean hot chicks in Lycra, then surely yoga's the work of the Lord. WTF!?!

Relationships would be a lot simpler if everybody was just honest with each other. They'd be a lot more brutal too, but at least everyone would know exactly where they stand and what's expected of them.

Men! Women! LOL! This jerk-off knows what I’m talking a bout, she’s telling it like it is, that men can be bought and sold like commodities on an open market,, then move on to the next easily manipulable douche-face. Easy!

Who says internet friends aren’t real friends? So take that mum! Sarah and Paige have been BFFs since they were only 8 years of age, but the totally crazy thing is, they’ve never met… until now.

Once you let a cat do something like this, then that's it. They've seen you'll weaken and then they'll just use it again and again. So now every time this woman brushes her teeth with a towel on her head, along comes kitty.

A small child wielding a broad sword attempts to rid a city of the giant missile firing robotic menace that is steadily destroying it. Will he manage to defeat his quarry or will playtime be over before he manages it?

A short but awesome remake of Cee Low Green's classic earworm, with the welcome addition of the cast of Pocohontas, or Mulan, or one of those other Disney crapfests that I never bothered watching.

Is it natural selection at work getting rid of the stupid amongst us? I wonder what it feels like to have testicles in the back of your throat, if you want to find out just follow this guy's example.

When a chemicalexplosion is a real threat at your office, maybe you shouldn't smoke cigarettes on the job. Just a thought.

This guy is trying to teach a 13 1/2 foot alligator a new trick. Lets hope it goes well and he doesn't get in the mood for a human snack. So far I don't think the alligator understands his part in the trick.