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What The Hell Is Wrong With This Year?
For those of us hanging on every word of the Book of Revelations, the Mayan calendar, and the quatrains of Nostradamus, shit happens in historical (hysterical?) cycles.
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If you said A then you're not all there. This isn't a debate, it's a matter of right and wrong, and if you're on the side of the A then you're firmly in the wrong. Fact.
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I'm going to have to start carrying googly eyes wherever I go. They can make even the most mundane things totally hilarious. God bless whoever invented these things. You, sir are a true hero of humanity.
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He's cooler than a cucumber in a freezer and has a meeow that chicks go wild for. Forget Jim Morrison, this is the cat we all want to be like when we grow up!
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He's an odd looking fella, but one that you can definitely pick out of a crowd. Even more so now that he's styling himself after Vanilla Ice...
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Pedo Bear has made his way across just about every inch of the internet. Now his approval hits the real world. With how low these sit to the ground and their popularity amongst youngsters, of course he approves of Lamborghinis!
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Hanging out with the cool kids. It's something that everyone wishes they could do but statistically very few will ever achieve. You'll probably end up hanging out with a bunch of flid-handed weirdos.
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Ones does not simply walk into Mordor. First you need to go get yourself a nice big sun-hat and a couple of thousand gallons of the strongest sunblock money can buy. Otherwise you'll end up looking like jerky.
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Trust a panda to break with all rules of animal tradition and wander off into a playpark and ride a unicorn, in any other place this would be surreal, but on the internet it's kinda normal!
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Ah, this explains everything! Don't worry Mark, I'm sure special guest starring in cartoons and at Sci-Fi conventions will make just as much money!
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Listen very carefully to the old Chinese Sage's pearls of total wisdom! "Man who run behind bus get exhausted, man who run in front of bus get tired."
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