It's Complicated

This is a phrase that women use all the time but frankly I agree with Ashton. Until you've had to pee with morning wood, you don't know the meaning of the word.

So, you're going to end it all, what's the point in going on if the girl of your dreams doesn't like you? But then she turns up just at the right moment, and comes up with a suggestion that could change it all...

When Chuck Norris plays ches he plays to win. Don't even begin to think about challenging him because you will lose before you have even moved the first piece. And don't even think about asking Chuck if that's a legal move.

If animals could text the world would be a much different place. Well, not really, it'd be pretty much exactly the same except you'd need to pay for your pet's phonebills as well as your own. F#ck that.

Don't let your eye be distracted by the three hotties in the front of the picture posing in just their underwear. Off in the distance is quite possibly the greatest superhero costume ever created.

We laugh because it's funny, we laugh because it's true. You can only imagine the number of greasy-haired pedervs that have to confront each other's sweat-beaded face when trying to entrap young kids. Maybe like 5 or so.

They're not all hot. Some of them are actually physically repellant. But through an Xbox Live headset they all sound thoroughly heaven-sent.

Well, I suppose this isn't REALLY giving the finger.. but it's still flipping someone off.

What is it about celebrities that in their school yearbook photos they look like the biggest dorks on earth? Is it some kind of revenge thing, to get famous after being picked on for their entire educational attendance?

When someone says to a woman, "Put your face on", it isn't just a figure of speech. So be careful the next time you meet up with a cute girl, lurking beneath the pretty face could be Steve Buscemi.

Even Gandalf thinks that SOPA/PIPA is completely retarded and he's going to stand there with his magic stick and shout at it until it goes away. Good on ya, beardy. You tell 'em.